Baldness Humour – Baldness Jokes

baldness humour

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If a man is bald, What is the colour of his hair on a licence

 

baldness humour

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He wears a wig. It makes him look at least ten years sillier.

 

Baldness humour

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Baldness may be a sign of virility, but it sure cuts down on a bloke’s chance to Prove It.

 

Baldness Humour

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Look, Almost all of us are Bald

 

bald jokes

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bald is the new Black

 

Baldness humour

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I said to my mate earlier that I fully expect to go bald.

Is it a family thing he asked.

You bet I replied, A nagging wife and four moaning kids.

 

Save money on hair restorer. Simply draw some rabbits on your bald head. From a distance they'll look like hares.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Save money on hair restorer.

Simply draw some rabbits on your bald head.

From a distance, they’ll look like hares.

 

I heard a knock at the door earlier, my wife answered and said there's a man at the door with a bald head I said Tell him I've already got one

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I heard a knock at the door earlier, my wife answered and said “There’s a man at the door with a bald head”

I said “Tell him I’ve already got one”

 

Even though I've gone bald, I still keep the comb I've had for nearly twenty years.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Even though I’ve gone bald, I still keep the comb I’ve had for nearly twenty years.

I just can’t part with it!

 

baldness jokes

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yesterday my 3-year old son pointed to my bald head and said it looked like a lightbulb.

I was incandescent with rage.

 

baldness jokes

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A woman came over to me in a club, rubbed my head and asked: “Is it true, do bald men make better lovers?”

I said “I don’t know. I haven’t had sex with any”

 

baldness jokes bald jokes

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I clicked on a link saying ‘Bald and Barely Legal’ yesterday.

I waited for the page to load.

It was a Department of Transport website about car tyres.

 

bald jokes bald humour

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Do bald men wash their heads with soap or shampoo

 

“I was going to buy a book on hair loss, but the pages kept falling out.” Jay London

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“I was going to buy a book on hair loss, but the pages kept falling out.”

Jay London

Just because he prefers blondes, doesn't make him a gentleman!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Just because he prefers blondes, doesn’t make him a gentleman!

What have you done your hair? It looks like a wig

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What have you done your hair  It looks like a wig

He wears a wig. It makes him look at least ten years sillier

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He wears a wig. It makes him look at least ten years sillier

I've been washing my hair too much it's shrinking

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’ve been washing my hair too much it’s shrinking

I started going bald very early. In fact in high school I was voted " Most likely to Recede"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I started going bald very early. In fact, in high school, I was voted ” Most likely to Recede”

There’s one proverb that really depresses him “Hair today, gone tomorrow.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There’s one proverb that really depresses him  – “Hair today, gone tomorrow.”

He washed his hair this morning and forgot where he put it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He washed his hair this morning and forgot where he put it.

Today's toupees really fool people, but only those people that wear them.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Today’s toupees really fool people, but only those people that wear them.

Did you lose your hair by worrying? Yes worrying about losing my hair !!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Did you lose your hair by worrying?

Yes worrying about losing my hair !!

He's very sensitive about his hair. I don't know why he hasn't got any

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He’s very sensitive about his hair. I don’t know why he hasn’t got any!

I could tell you things about your baldness that would make your hair fall out

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I could tell you things about your baldness that would make your hair fall out.

What did the bald man say when he got a comb for his birthday? “Thanks, I’ll never part with it!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What did the bald man say when he got a comb for his birthday?

“Thanks, I’ll never part with it!”

Doctor my hair keeps falling out, can you give me anything to keep it in ? Doctor: Yes, here's a shoe box !

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Doctor my hair keeps falling out, can you give me anything to keep it in?

Doctor: Yes, here’s a shoe box!

Why did the bald man go outside To get some fresh hair !

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why did the bald man go outside

To get some fresh hair!

There are three ways a man wears his hair parted, unparted, and departed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There are three ways a man wears his hair parted, unparted, and departed.

I am not bald I'm just follicly challenged.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I am not bald I’m just follicly challenged.

What did the Bald man get for Christmas? Bald and fat.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What did the Bald man get for Christmas?

Bald and fat.

Balding Man: Why did you take off so much hair? Barber: I didn’t, nature beat me to it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Balding Man: Why did you take off so much hair?

Barber: I didn’t, nature beat me to it.

Woke up this morning after a heavy night of drinking to find out that I'd gone bald. Which is strange because normally I go for brunettes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Woke up this morning after a heavy night of drinking to find out that I’d gone bald.

Which is strange because normally I go for brunettes.

I first realised that I was going bald when it started taking longer and longer to wash my face...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I first realised that I was going bald when it started taking longer and longer to wash my face…

I had a camera and, whenever I photographed people, they came out looking bald-headed...it was then I realised that I was using Kojak film.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I had a camera and, whenever I photographed people, they came out looking bald-headed…it was then I realised that I was using Kojak film.

I went to the barber's yesterday. He said, you're starting to go bald. I said, well, get a move on then.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I went to the barber’s yesterday. He said you’re starting to go bald.

I said, well, get a move on then.

A friend had been bald so long, I suggested he get himself a transplant. He didn't go for it, thinking he'd look stupid with a kidney on his head.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A friend had been bald so long, I suggested he get himself a transplant.

He didn’t go for it, thinking he’d look stupid with a kidney on his head.

 

Baldness Humour